Tag Archives: aesthetics

Why We Can’t Get a Cat – part 2

Standard

Dear peeps,

 

I considered titling this post “why we can’t adopt a child”, but figured that would require too much explaining. Instead, some of you may remember that time my mother decided that a proper pet should serve as interior decoration (The Aesthetics of a Perfect Cat – choosing a pet)*. Well, this is a sort of continuation of that :D

It is true that, in many ways, my mother and I share the same taste (when it comes to Jude Law, for example, or the fact that chocolate cake is not adequate unless it is basically a brownie). However, some fundamental differences have cropped up. These differences include views on curfews, skirt lengths, bright purple nail-polish, tomatoes, or cats, as previously mentioned. But never did I expect for it to go so far as….

CHILDREN

 

 

 

it's not what it sounds like

it’s not what it sounds like

 

i swear, youre getting a totally wrong idea! #diggingmyowngrave

The thing is that my mom and I have had multiple conversations in the past like this:

Penny: That’s a cute one!

Mom: Nah…

Penny: It’s a baby, how can you be so mean?

Mom: It’s just ugly.

 

innocent child, blissfully unaware of the harsh critique it is receiving

Or this:

Mom: Ok, that one’s cute!

Penny: Hm….I suppose. It’s not quite my style.

Mom: What’s wrong with it?

Penny: It’s too pale. I like the chubby ones with sparkly eyes and everything.ย My mother did wish for me to specify that this is a sort of parody of reality, and that she does find all ย babies to be adorable (except for the screaming ones), especially the ones with sparkly eyes and everything. I guess I shouldn’t go around misrepresenting people like this.

ok, so this one might be suspecting something…

Fortunately, my mother and I probably won’t be adopting children together any time soon, so the problem remains irrelevant. Also, we’ve decided that my children will be the cutest anyway, so…I’m just going to be silent now…

 

Cheers,

Penny

 

*We really never did get a cat, by the way.

 

The Aesthetics Of A Perfect Cat – choosing a pet

Standard

Dear peeps,

 

Some of you may own – or have owned – a pet.

And I ask you, in all sincerity: How did you choose it?

Did you adopt? Did you buy from the pet-store? Did you get a kitten from your friend’s litter?

You see, my mother recently decided that we were going to finally get a cat. I say finally, because we have decided this at least four times in the last eight years, to very unspectacular results.

we own this book, and at age 12, i read the whole thing

This time doesn’t seem drastically different, because although we made up our minds as to how we were going to acquire a cat – we were going to adopt one – my mother has her heart set on getting a cat that also serves as interior decoration.

this would seem like the ideal solution (in fact, her comment on this picture was “actually, that’s beautiful”)

So, we got to searching every conceivable adopt-a-pet website for the most flawless animal we could find.

Not so difficult, you say? There are plenty of gorgeous cats, you say?

The problem was, my mother and I appear to have different tastes in cat.

Yes, because while I had previously believed my own preferred type of cat to be the universally appreciated one, I was apparently quite mistaken.

My choices were labelled “skinny”, “emaciated”, “ugly”, “scary”, “revolting”, “pitiful”, and my personal favorite: “depressed“. We wouldn’t want to get a cat in need of professional therapy, would we?

i feel like decision making would be simpler

Also, update: The cat can’t smell like a cat.

In other words, we probably won’t be getting a cat.

But we can always satisfy our longing for the feline creatures by consuming multiple hours of cat-videos on YouTube. And indeed, we have done this in the past.

azure_99172810ce3e982a774c92f65e2b83d8

i find it mildly concerning that not only is this an option, but ONE HOUR? #simslogic #underoroverstatement?

The best way to do this is by typing in “cute fluffy cat“, and then judging the fluffiness of the cats in question, while leaving insulting comments if the alleged “fluffy” cat is not fluffy enough.

that may or may not have happened…

Basically, I will most likely end up a crazy cat lady, while my mother goes through pages and pages of what she described as “a dating website for cats”, wishing she were a crazy cat lady.

Can’t wait!

 

Cheers,

Penny