Parties, Regrets, and Split Personalities

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Hi fellow Internetpeople,

All right. Oncoming confession.

Have you ever gone to an event (a party, i.e.), and created memories you now regret in every possible way?

Congratulations! So have I!

This dog looks like he understands.

Except, while most people do this once or twice and learn from their embarrassment, I seem to have this uncontrollable pattern of FORGETTING MY PAST the day of the event, so that I end up simply increasing the amount of mistakes that I can later obsess over while trying to fall asleep.

You see, there are two possible Pennys you might encounter:

1. Conservative, careful, shy, SENSIBLE Penny (downside: slightly boring)

2. Wild, fun, 100% uninhibited, awesome Penny (downside: *mild* insanity)

And naturally, whenever I go out, I am entirely aware of this fact, so I do my best to ensure that Penny number one does in no way come to light. (life lesson: always be yourself, kids!)

In fact, there are exactly two occasions I’ve been to that did not result in cringe-worthy flashbacks later in my more civilized moments. However, both of these occasions are also not even worth mentioning, because literally nothing interesting happened.

I believe an important quote by I’m-not-sure-who is appropriate:

“The greatest regrets do not come from what you did, but what you did not do.”

Aren’t I, though?

My point being, as a very wise 17-year-old: I have zero intentions of changing in the near future! #tadaaaa

Also, for any of you who might be interested, here is the last horrific thing that I did at a party:

I love to dance. I kid you not. I will always be that weirdo that drags their friend onto the dance floor before anyone else has even finished their drink. And not be ashamed.

So, at this last dance party, I was dancing with a guy friend, and we WERE ON A ROLL, peeps, we were on fire! All the moves, yeah man.

Of course, then what happens, is that carried-away Penny decides to do the ULTIMATE swag dance move: The-twist-down-and-back-up-again-in-vintage-sixties-fashion.

My plan: Guy friend twists with me simultaneously, and we look totally cool.

Reality: Penny twists by herself, bringing head right down to *that* level, completely unaware of what world of innuendos (om-literal-g) she has just thrown herself into.

Penny didn’t notice this at the time, thank my lucky stars. Otherwise, that might have put a damper on my night.

But, because high school is a cruel, unforgiving place…girl friend who was present at the time has made sure that as many people find out about this as seems humanly possible. Hurrah for friends :)

I like how my guy friend, who surely was aware of this, did nothing to save me. Nothing. *crawls into solitary corner and cries*

Another adorable animal that looks like it would understand.

But, as I said before: Despite having all the regrets, I regret nothing! So join me in my dangerous fun!

And if you have stories you want to share, comment and I’ll feel better about myself ;)

Cheers,

Penny

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2 responses »

Feel free to express yourselves :) #madonnareference

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